Christmas With Dad

Family Christmas Countdown

1 week before:

Lindsay and I headed to Katy Mills to wrap up our Christmas shopping. I left Lindsay in bath and body works to visit Bass Pro Shop. I felt certain I could find something for my dad there. I wandered around a forrest of camo attire, and finally decided to consult my brothers. Both proved completely worthless. Tyler, however, came up with an idea in the end. Apparently my dad had just gotten a new gun that he was pretty proud of. We decided that maybe we could go in together and get him an accessory like a scope. Tyler instructed me to go to the gun counter and give them the code for the gun. I had absolutely no idea what I was asking about, but didn't have time for a tutorial.

I walked to the counter and asked, "Can I see an accessory to a Colt AR15, please?"

The guy behind the counter gave me a funny look before saying, "ma'am, we don't sell assault rifles here.".

Oops! Pretty sure I'm on some watch list now. They're probably wondering just what in fact I wanted a scope for an assault rifle for.

At a loss, I wandered back into the camo forrest. After much debate, I settled on a pair of bibs. I felt sure he could use them working in the panhandle. It's cold and windy there! Plus, Tyler assured me Dad didn't have any. I left Katy feeling good about my purchase.

Day of Family Christmas

5 hours before:
I am hurrying to Lubbock to help my dad do his Christmas shopping. This is completely normal and expected from him. He's a fly by the seat of his pants kind of Christmas shopper.

3 hours before:
I met Dad, Tyler and Tucker at On The Border where they were having a few beers to prepare for family Christmas. While this happened, my dad began telling us of a recent trip to Oklahoma City.
"Hey y'all, I was in Oklahoma City last week and I got some really cool bibs there. They are made with the material they use for astronauts! The same stuff they went to the moon in! I got a coat too!" He raved.

At this point I had to close my mouth. I mean, really? Out of all things to buy? He stole my Christmas present idea! And if you haven't met my father, he's a bit eccentric and has a tendency to go overboard. It's his own fault he's so hard to buy for!

Tyler thinks all of this is hilarious.

"You say you got bibs, did ya?" he asked my dad. I about kicked him under the table.


1 hour before:
The four of us met at best buy for some quick, last minute Christmas shopping. We ran around picking gifts, checked out, and loaded the truck.

15 minutes before:
By the light of the moon (and Tuck's tail light), we started to wrap presents in the bed of the truck in my grandmother's driveway. Tucker was in charge of getting wrapping paper. As we unrolled the seemingly silver paper, we discovered it was clear! Thankfully, Grandmother let us borrow some.

Game time:
Dad unwrapped his regular old bibs from me and we survived another family Christmas!

Post report:
I got home to a bed with missing sheets, no hot water in the hall bath... And we were all woken up by runaway horses hangin out on the highway in the middle of the night!

Until next year...



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

That One Time There Was A Warrant For My Arrest...

This is the last week of school before Christmas. I'm exhausted and there's a million things to do.  And, to top it all off, I feel like my head is a balloon about to take off. 

After taking the kids to outclass, I checked my email and saw one from my dad titled, "Warrant for your arrest".  The email said nothing, but had an attachment with it.  My father, the technological cowboy, had scanned a letter dated 11-30-10 and emailed it to me (without any sort of questions, scolding, or a lawyer's phone number). He has always warned us about getting thrown in jail-- we would be on our own, and not to make our one phone call to him! I was thankful he let me know I was wanted by the law, for it was in fact, a warrant for my arrest. 

I read the letter ten times before realizing it was real. I don't get service in my school and the letter was from Sulphur Springs, so I walked outside to the playground to call the number and hear what was going on.

The lady told me that this was about a ticket for outdated registration on a random highway October 23, 2004.  Let's just remember that in a few weeks it will be 2011.  Also, the address was my father's. So really, they could have been sending notices all these years and I would never know, because I'm pretty sure my dad hides from his mailbox.  I assured the lady on the phone that I didn't remember any of this, but that if I did, I would have definitely taken care of it!

Kindly, she gave me the number of the Judge in Bronte, TX. Population 1076.  He answered his own phone.  I went into my big spill about how I was sure I was innocent, laying on the sweet talk and "yes sirs" good and thick.  I had to pause for a minute while his computer booted up and he found my case. 

He spoke with a slow, southern drawl, "Miss Waggoner, this was so long ago, and I don't have any proof, and you don't have any proof, I think I'll just take care of this for ya." 


Annnnnd, I am no longer wanted by the State of Texas.  :)